Be Quiet Urethra!

I have been living gluten-free (GF) for about three months now and it has been quite an experience. I decided to go GF because I have been having major issues with my urethra. That's right a 28 year old woman is extremely aware of her urethra. I shouldn't even know where the damn thing is, but no, I think about it constantly. I thought the issue was constant UTI's but modern medicine hasn't been able to confirm my theory. The pain and irritation was starting to affect my life in serious ways. I was not able to enjoy sex anymore and was constantly worried about if and when I was going to be in pain again. So I decided to be proactive. Take control! I changed my attitude and my diet. I figured why not? Gluten is supposed to be pretty bad and I needed to do something for my body. So bye bye gluten!

At first, it wasn't so bad. And I felt good! I ate so much fruit and veggies. I was pooping three times a day! (that is how I measure health) And best of all, I wasn't getting sick. I lasted on this proactive high till the first time I went to my in-laws for dinner and realized I couldn't eat the pizza. The pizza from the best restaurant around. The pizza that smelled so f-ing good! Nope, not only could I not eat the pizza but then my mother-in-law made me dinner. Which just made me feel bad because no one should have to do more work for my life style decision. After that pizza incident it has not gotten any easier. I am still GF, but now-a-days I crave gluten more often.


I have found some good alternatives though. Trader Joe's has amazing chocolate chip cookies. Sprouts sells awesome brownie and pancake mix. And I learned how to make rice krispies treats, which have become a staple in the house. GF isn't always easy or convenient, but it seems that gluten-free has lead me to being pain-free. Pain-free is the way to be. So I guess I can forgo the pizza, cakes, and all other awesome foods for the opportunity to live life like I should...without a say-so from my urethra.

Don't be a hater!

I decided that the girls and I should get together for a little happy hour after work today. It has been a long week and we haven't gotten to hang out. So it was organized...

I got to the restaurant first and scored us a table on the patio away from all the other patrons. This is important because we are loud and sometimes inappropriate. We congregated, ordered drinks and started to unwind from the long week. It was so great...and then an older couple decided to sit at the table right next to us. It was open seating in an area with twenty five other open tables. Why sit next to a group of five women who are drinking?

So at first we don't notice this couple and continue on with our awesome conversation, which touched upon topics such as, sex (of course), the minute details of laser hair removal, husbands, and baby making. Of course there was foul language and inappropriate comments. However, our table neighbors started turning around and looking at us. This made us more aware of our topics and volume. By the end of the meal we were getting death stares from this couple.

I started feeling bad. Were we ruining their meal? Should we stop? Or leave?  As I was getting up to leave I almost apologized. Then I realized that we were having a good time and it is not my fault they decided to seat at the table directly adjacent and ease drop. And another thing...have you ever noticed that when people are not enjoying their meal they get upset with anybody else who is? It is not my fault that you two have been together so long that you no longer enjoy each others company. Uhhhh....stop with the hating.